Touching Moments and Characterization in Romance Writing

When it comes to romance writing, touch is the most powerful and yet underused tool in developing all aspects of the story. Aside from the implicit carnal side, touch serves many other purposes in relationships, which in turn can strengthen your writings. Using touch to maximum effect also gives you opportunity to avoid cliches such as stilted dialogue and implausible plot twists. Once you realize how, you can use it to develop more intricate bonds between your characters.

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The easiest place to start is to look at touch as a way to communicate. Not every person or character is able to verbally express how they feel, but a hug, hand holding or well timed shoulder grab can say so much. A great example of this is in the movie WALL-E . The primary communication between WALL-E and Eve is through hand holding. They may lack typical hands, but they still hold hands. That gesture serves many functions for both of them, including Eve helping WALL-E remember who he is after she fixes him. This works for humans as well. Aside from the obvious gestures, playful poking shows the lighter side of a couple. Similarly, repeated non-harmful touching of any sort establishes a bond between two people. It creates a positive response in the brain that links the other person to a pleasant feeling all over. Even people who generally hate to be touched enjoy hugs and neck rubs from those they love. This sort of touching communicates the message “I like having you around. Please stay.” Try it. Write a scene in which a couple is having a discussion that leads to disagreement and have them wrap it up peacefully. Odds are one of the characters will touch the other in some comforting way to keep the other from getting too upset and/or wont to run off.

Touch also conveys changes for a couple. If there is potential trouble for a couple, less frequent touching can convey just as much tension as an argument. The type of touching also makes a difference. If the couple is normally grabby, a brusque shoulder hug highlights a shift in their relationship. This can also work for positive changes in a relationship. A different, closer type of touching between a new couple can show the two growing closer to one another. If you’re tired of arguing between two characters or are at a loss for ways to show two reticent individuals becoming more comfortable with each other, use touch. You can use a lack of touch to emphasize the emotional distance separating the first couple. With the second one, a good snuggle session (full of hesitant closeness and hugging) shows their emerging bond.

Perhaps the most interesting use of touch in romantic writing is to initiate a romantic relationship. A lot of people get tongue tied when they try to voice their affections for someone who might not feel the same. Odds are, your characters have similar mindsets. In that case, have them touch the person they like. If the recipient is clueless, up the touching little by little, as long as it stays true to the character. If it doesn’t make sense for your character to grope someone, having them do so when admitting to liking someone is creepy. Using touch to initiate a relationship also works for bolder characters. In fact, having a bold character come right out and kiss the person he or she fancies can both start a relationship and highlight the outgoing or risk-taking side of a character. With a bold character, this can also show his or her personality working against initiating a relationship if the recipient is put off by what happens. On top of all that, having characters touch can help you avoid cheesy, cliched “I like you” dialogue that sends some readers running for the hills.

Before you have your characters hold hands, though, get to know your characters. Do your characters like to touch people and be touched? If so, to what degree? Some people are outwardly affectionate with a variety of people, while others only want to be touched by those they trust (who happen to be few and far between). Another factor to consider is how your characters react to being touched. When I lived in Miami, a lot of people saw touch as a welcome thing and didn’t read much into it other than warm gestures between friends. This made me the odd one out, as I generally do not like to be touched and will think there is an ulterior motive behind it. So if a character in a potential pair doesn’t like being touched or may be put on alert by it, be careful when including touch as a romantic element. Otherwise, it could lead to wild (and perhaps disruptive) character changes that could throw everyone for a loop.

How do you figure out these things about your characters? Sketch out some unrelated scenes where touching might be involved. Good situations for this include family gatherings or spending the afternoon with close friends. You could also sketch a scene in which the character is being clumsy and has to be helped by other people for whatever reason. These situations may not be romantic, but some degree of touching is involved. Have the character touch and be touched in these scenes. How does the character respond to being touched? Does the character initiate touch? If so, how? Not all of the information you will find in this exercise will provide a blueprint for how a character will react to touch. Instead, consider it a starting point so you can determine what a realistic reaction is for your character in light of a romantic encounter.

Touch is a good way to increase the “action” factor in a romance piece, and I don’t mean that in a bodice-ripping way. Even a platonic gesture can speak volumes about a relationship (and takes fewer word to describe, too). Try it out. You just might find that touch is the key to making your love story more realistic and perhaps palatable to those who avoid romance like the plague.